Soapboxes Waiting for Christmas

I'm the kind of person that can't let things sit. If I have the ability to make things happen then you better believe they will be happening.

My mom and Jeff make fun of me for this all the time. I have zero patience when it comes to life decisions. If I don't feel calm or content about something in the future then I have to talk about it till it's fixed and I feel good.

It's a problem.

The fact that I am this way is a problem...........not the making fun of me part. Ha ha :)

Anyways.......

Remember my last post about my internship??

Ha ha ha, well that's all figured out now! (I couldn't let it sit) I'm actually doing it at a daycare/preschool/kindergarten. After not hearing from the Early Intervention people for almost two weeks I had to give up and go with a preschool.

In a lot of ways it's not really giving up though. This place is supposed to be super good quality which makes me excited. My professor recommended it so I'm hoping it'll be awesome. The reason why it's not giving up is because I feel like I need this experience to get over my crazy biased stigma against daycares.

Oh my goodness, I hate daycares. That's another problem I have. (ha ha)

Yes, I'm on my soapbox, don't judge me.

I also had a really bad experience with a daycare about a month ago. I don't think I blogged about it?

I applied to work at this daycare..........because I was sick of my job (which is a whole other story :) ) and I wanted to work with littler kids. They called me in for a "working interview" which meant they wanted me to come in and teach a half hour lesson to four year olds.

I prepared this adorable lesson with Pete the Cat (and his four grooooooooovy buttons) and it was going to be the best thing ever. I actually worked pretty hard on it which is another reason that made me so upset about it later when it ended up being completely ridiculous.

Sigh.

So I went in for the "working interview" and the director of the place didn't talk to me. This random worker was like: "Oh....uh....I think you're supposed to be in this room..." I went into the room and it was utter chaos. Fifteen 2-4 year olds going crazy! There were two workers in there texting on their phones and showing each other funny youtube videos. I was kind of shell shocked.

So then the two workers said hi to me and asked me to help with the snowflake making at a table in the corner during "center time". Neither of them knew how to make snowflakes........but for some reason they made it one of their lessons for the day.

Brilliance!

They proceeded to scream at the children to "sit their butts down and listen". (I would have hated to see the look on my face cause I bet I looked completely terrified) So once the children set their butts down we divided up into groups and I took some kids and made snowflakes.

While I was making snowflakes one of the two workers came over and looked at what we were doing. Apparently her son was sitting at the table with me. He was just cutting out a snowflake and his mom (the worker) looked at him and screamed (not exaggerating) something about sitting his butt down (common theme). Then she weirdly looked over at me and said: "Sorry, he's mine, he drives me crazy." I was kind of taken back/confused so I said: "He's your son?" and she said: "Yeah, and he's autistic so that's why he's like that."

I just froze and had to contain my anger. There was NO way she just called that kid "autistic". There was nothing even remotely autistic about him. He was fully verbal, he didn't show any of the little autistic tendencies that autistic children have, he was completely normal. I was about to lose it when she said that. I wanted to tell her how I knew all about autism because I worked for a year with severely autisitic children and her son wasn't even in the same ball park as any of them. He didn't even have aspergers (lower form of autism) as far as I could tell. I have a kid at my work right now who has aspergers and no offense.........but you can tell when a child has a disability like that.

Oh my goodness.....craziness. 

Weeeeeeeeell.......an hour later (I was only supposed to be there for a half hour) this lady comes in and asks me if I'm the one that needed the laptop (I had called the day before because I needed a computer to play the Pete the Cat song. The lady on the phone had told me to bring my own which I did.) I informed her that I had one, but I was pretty sure they weren't going to give me a chance to do my lesson. She looked super awkward and was like....."oh....uh....ok" and then left.

Another fifteen minutes went by and then the two workers were like: "Uh....so you can probably leave now. The director will call you tomorrow to let you know if you got it or not."

...............................................................................................

She'll what?

She'll let me know if I got it?? How on earth would she know? She never saw me "working".

Yep. I hate daycares.

So I'm thinking this internship will be a good experience for me to get past how much I hate them. The directors of this place that I'm doing my internship graduated from Weber in Early Childhood recently and they sound awesome! I'm hoping since they went through the same program as me that they will employee the same ethics and practices that I believe in. *crossing my fingers*

Having my phone out/not paying attention to children, screaming at children, and not engaging with children are all reasons why I don't like daycares. So I'm hoping none of that will go on during my internship.

I can't stand it when caregivers don't pay attention to children in jobs like that. It drives me utterly mad. It's your JOB to play with the children....to teach the children.......to love the children......to create a happy and safe environment so they can learn. Ugh.

That's the number one reason I'm taking on the career that I am. To do all of those wonderful things so that children can learn, feel safe, be happy, etc. If I was doing it for the money that would be a joke. There is no money in it, ha ha. If I was doing it for myself that would also be a joke because working with children in early childhood (or any age) is hard work and tires you out very fast.

In the end, it's all about the children.

*gets off of soapbox*

Obviously I still have a little bit of anger surrounding that interview experience. Ha.....sorry.

It's all over now so I just need to move forward!

Jeff and I have been so busy this semester I feel like we haven't really had a chance to sit down and enjoy the holiday season yet.

We set up our tree last night and it's beautiful! I love Christmas trees. I put on an ornament that my grandma gave me a couple years ago and it made me cry. I love my grandma.

I got home today from work and there was a present under the tree for me from Jeff already.

I love him.

He really is the biggest trooper ever. Lately I've been having a lot of anxiety over what is going to happen in the future with next semester, graduating, finding a job, etc. and he's dealt with it all and never complained. He deserves a gold medal for putting up with me.

Now I just need to get done with my three finals and then I feel like I can settle down and just enjoy the Christmas season.

I'm so grateful for Christ's birth and for the life He lived. I think the crazier my life gets the more I realize how amazing His sacrifice for us was. The busier I am the more I find myself needing that extra help that comes from the Atonement. We sang Silent Night yesterday in church and it made me cry thinking about the miracle of His birth. I'm grateful to know that He lives and that His church is true.

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