:)
Like most of my posts, the title really means nothing. (it's a song lyric)
It's been a month. Has it? I can't remember the last time I posted.....so it must at least be a month.
Life. L'claim.
Oy my life!
I say this to my mom pretty much every time I talk to her on the phone (a couple times a day on average).
Sometimes life isn't picture perfect, it's still pretty great, but not like you planned it to be? It's usually in the stretches of time that we don't plan that we learn the most though. I think because of that I'll be learning a lot in the next while.
Do you wish I was more specific?
Ya. Me too.
I'm graduating in a month. Whoa. It's going to be really good! At the same time it's going to be really bad........because then I have to do something with myself. Not being in school for the first time in 19 years will be strange. I kind of think I'm going to feel like I won't have anywhere to belong. Right now that's how I feel!
I've been looking ENDlessly for a good job.
Not some lame job that's going to burn me out in a matter of weeks (cause I've already found that).
Speaking of! I started my internship. I don't think I've talked about that on here yet. It's been a ride for sure. Definitely interesting. I've landed myself in the two year old classroom, with extended hours cause they actually wanted to hire me. Getting paid is better than not, right??
The toddlers are kind of hilarious. They don't talk very well yet, but they talk enough to get themselves into trouble. They like to hit and bite. They like to puke and almost make me puke with some things that come out of their diapers. They like trying to go potty, but mostly to get a treat afterwards (hate that.....).
Positive reinforcement. Ugh. *rant on early childhood development ensues*
Daycare is so interesting. If I was going to get a doctorate (or even a masters) I would definitely do research on daycare. Most definitely. It fascinates me, honestly, which in the end is good because it means this internship, turned into a job, isn't totally off the mark.
Although I do have a "job" I'm not going to keep it past graduation. Getting paid what I would get paid at McDonald's makes me sad.....especially after getting a bachelor's degree. I'm not trying to be high and mighty, because honestly my degree can't really get me the big bucks either, but....sigh. I've worked hard and I want something to show for it.....is that too much to ask!?
Sometimes I think it is, ha ha.
I've applied for lots of jobs recently, but nothing is really seeming to be right. Nothing is fitting. I've applied with Head Start in two different counties which would be cool. I'm a fan of Head Start, especially in Davis School District because you actually get a classroom in an elementary school. That would be fun.
My supervising teacher for my student teaching thinks I should work at Weber's Children's School. Aka, have the same job that she does. Ha ha. She told me I needed to apply this weekend and she would be upset if I hadn't come Monday. If it actually worked out it would be an amazingly cool job and a great experience. Who knows if it ever would work out though?
In other news, Jeff and I will be married two years on Tuesday! Craziness!
He has been such a great support to me as I've finished school. Through all of my frustrations and tears and hard times he's been the best. He is way more mature than me and way more put together. I'm pretty sure I wouldn't be graduating if it wasn't for him. I love him for that.
When we first got married he told me that if I wanted to finish school I could, but if I didn't want to I didn't need to. He's always said that no matter what I do he'll love me and be proud of me. I think because of how selfless he is it pushed me to graduate. I've always wanted to graduate....but in the back of my mind I always thought it was possible that it wouldn't happen.
I'm grateful that I married the man that I did and that he makes me the best me I can be. He accepts me on days when I'm not my best me (which has been WAY too much lately with how stressed I have been). I think that's the best thing anyone could ever ask for is to have a companion that totally accepts who you are and loves you more and more all the time.
Jeff and I are going to California with my family in July to see Josh Groban! We are also going to go to Six Flags and some other wonderment too. :) With Josh's new album coming out it's been a bright spot in my otherwise hectic schedule since January. Josh always comes out with songs that seem to be PERFECT for my life at the time that he releases them. So great! His single that came out is my favorite (along with the rest of the album). I'll leave the music video here because if you're reading this......and have been feeling any of the things that I've talked about in this post you will definitely love it too.
Brave
You should also watch this because it makes me smile. A LOT! I love Josh!
Saturday, March 23, 2013
Monday, February 18, 2013
Movin' through the adventures of life.....
I'm done with my job at the YMCA.
I start a new phase of my life tomorrow which will be totally different.
It's weird.
I learned a lot while working at the Y. I learned lots of good things. I learned lots of bad things. I learned lots of things that changed how I view the world.
I have a completely different view about: low income families, single parent families, Latino American families, African American families, Asian American families..............than I did before I started working there.
All in all I'm SO grateful I had the experience I had to work there. It really did humble me in ways I didn't think a situation like that would.
I love learning through children. They really are the best. The kids at my job really made my last week hard too by constantly hugging me, telling me they love me, telling me that I'm their favorite, telling me they wish I was their mom........
The majority of the kids I worked with came from hard situations. One boy in particular broke my heart this last week. He's a fourth grade boy who has a really weird/hard family and doesn't have a lot of love in his life. He was getting suspended from school a lot and was just kind of in a dark place.
He was one of our least favorite kids to work with cause he seemed to always cause problems.
Well, I was in charge of his homework group and making sure he got his homework done every week. On Tuesday I was helping him add fractions and it was being really hard for him. I tried making it fun and lighthearted and he seemed to be more at ease by how I was handling the situation. After we worked longer than any of the other kids, I told him I would go get him some Valentine's candy. He told me that he wanted a green conversation heart that said "Be Mine" on it. He said he wanted to give it to his Valentine, ha ha ha!
So I told him I would find one for him. (And I'm not an empty promise kind of teacher!)
I went and got the bag of candy and looked through it while my coworker talked to the kids during our daily meeting. The boy who I was finding the candy for watched me for a good seven minutes during the meeting, all the while I was looking for his heart.
When I finally found a green one with "Be Mine" on it I went over and gave it to him.
I think I'll always remember the look that was on his face.
He had this raw look that didn't have a ton of feeling behind it, but to me it almost meant: "I'm not sure how to feel about the fact that you cared enough to look for that heart for me." It made me realize that he probably doesn't have adults in his life that take time out of their lives to do things like that for him.
In the end, that heart really didn't need to be found. In fact, if I wouldn't have found it he probably would have gotten over it pretty quickly.
What he did because I DID find that piece of candy was the heartbreaking part.
We have clubs everyday and during clubs he made me a rain stick. Ha. He was in a recycled art club so he used some paper towel tubes, a water bottle, some beans, and a whole bunch of duct tape to make me a rain stick. And again when he gave it to me he had that raw emotionless look on his face almost saying: "please, accept it.".
Working with kids... you get tons and TONS of pictures, things made for you, etc. but this time it felt SO different. I knew he was proud of himself for making it for me. Especially after I enthusiastically accepted it he seemed very pleased with himself.
The hardest part of leaving that job was not knowing what the future holds for all of those children. I learned to love all of them. It's different working with low income children.
When I've worked at other elementary schools I've always left the kids knowing that they at least are going to be given some kind of chances in life. Like when I worked in Layton I knew that the large majority of the kids that I taught would go to college without a second thought, would be able to buy a house someday, or would be able to get a decent job in the future.
It's hard working within the cycle of poverty because it's harder for those children to break out of it. Realizing that you're leaving all of that behind is the hardest part for me.
Well, tomorrow I start my internship. I hope it works out! I'm kind of nervous about it.
I only have about two more months till graduation though! Spring break is only in two weeks and then once that is over I think the rest of the semester will fly by. I've really loved my student teaching so far! It's been a really big learning experience, but it's a very forgiving environment which is perfect for learning.
In other news, it's my birthday on Thursday! Jeff's been asking me what I want for my birthday and the only answer I have is......"preschool stuff!"
Ha ha ha ha.
I'm lame.
His answer to that is always: "k, but you're not going to need any of that for a long time."
(I probably really don't need anything like that till I have my own at home preschool, and that's not going to be for a couple more eons.)
Anywho, I'm going to be twenty-three. Which is old. So. Old! :)
Last week was Valentine's Day too. My poor husband has to get me stuff for Valentine's and then exactly a week later he has to do stuff for my birthday. Poor dude.
I love him a lot and I get way too spoiled by him!
I was telling Jeff the story of the boy making me the rain stick and I was telling him that I never want our children to feel the way that boy did in that moment. I want to let our kids know that they are loved SO much every day. I want them to know that I love them enough that I will spend seven pointless minutes to find them a little piece of candy. I want my kids to know that I will stop everything else that's happening to spend a minute with them. And just them.
It might seem like I'm being a little dramatic about this situation........but I think it's important to protect childhood and foster proper child development.
You'd think I was a child development major or something, huh?
Ha.
I love kids!
I'm sure I'll love the new ones I'm going to meet at my internship tomorrow too.
Onto my new adventure!
I start a new phase of my life tomorrow which will be totally different.
It's weird.
I learned a lot while working at the Y. I learned lots of good things. I learned lots of bad things. I learned lots of things that changed how I view the world.
I have a completely different view about: low income families, single parent families, Latino American families, African American families, Asian American families..............than I did before I started working there.
All in all I'm SO grateful I had the experience I had to work there. It really did humble me in ways I didn't think a situation like that would.
I love learning through children. They really are the best. The kids at my job really made my last week hard too by constantly hugging me, telling me they love me, telling me that I'm their favorite, telling me they wish I was their mom........
The majority of the kids I worked with came from hard situations. One boy in particular broke my heart this last week. He's a fourth grade boy who has a really weird/hard family and doesn't have a lot of love in his life. He was getting suspended from school a lot and was just kind of in a dark place.
He was one of our least favorite kids to work with cause he seemed to always cause problems.
Well, I was in charge of his homework group and making sure he got his homework done every week. On Tuesday I was helping him add fractions and it was being really hard for him. I tried making it fun and lighthearted and he seemed to be more at ease by how I was handling the situation. After we worked longer than any of the other kids, I told him I would go get him some Valentine's candy. He told me that he wanted a green conversation heart that said "Be Mine" on it. He said he wanted to give it to his Valentine, ha ha ha!
So I told him I would find one for him. (And I'm not an empty promise kind of teacher!)
I went and got the bag of candy and looked through it while my coworker talked to the kids during our daily meeting. The boy who I was finding the candy for watched me for a good seven minutes during the meeting, all the while I was looking for his heart.
When I finally found a green one with "Be Mine" on it I went over and gave it to him.
I think I'll always remember the look that was on his face.
He had this raw look that didn't have a ton of feeling behind it, but to me it almost meant: "I'm not sure how to feel about the fact that you cared enough to look for that heart for me." It made me realize that he probably doesn't have adults in his life that take time out of their lives to do things like that for him.
In the end, that heart really didn't need to be found. In fact, if I wouldn't have found it he probably would have gotten over it pretty quickly.
What he did because I DID find that piece of candy was the heartbreaking part.
We have clubs everyday and during clubs he made me a rain stick. Ha. He was in a recycled art club so he used some paper towel tubes, a water bottle, some beans, and a whole bunch of duct tape to make me a rain stick. And again when he gave it to me he had that raw emotionless look on his face almost saying: "please, accept it.".
Working with kids... you get tons and TONS of pictures, things made for you, etc. but this time it felt SO different. I knew he was proud of himself for making it for me. Especially after I enthusiastically accepted it he seemed very pleased with himself.
The hardest part of leaving that job was not knowing what the future holds for all of those children. I learned to love all of them. It's different working with low income children.
When I've worked at other elementary schools I've always left the kids knowing that they at least are going to be given some kind of chances in life. Like when I worked in Layton I knew that the large majority of the kids that I taught would go to college without a second thought, would be able to buy a house someday, or would be able to get a decent job in the future.
It's hard working within the cycle of poverty because it's harder for those children to break out of it. Realizing that you're leaving all of that behind is the hardest part for me.
Well, tomorrow I start my internship. I hope it works out! I'm kind of nervous about it.
I only have about two more months till graduation though! Spring break is only in two weeks and then once that is over I think the rest of the semester will fly by. I've really loved my student teaching so far! It's been a really big learning experience, but it's a very forgiving environment which is perfect for learning.
In other news, it's my birthday on Thursday! Jeff's been asking me what I want for my birthday and the only answer I have is......"preschool stuff!"
Ha ha ha ha.
I'm lame.
His answer to that is always: "k, but you're not going to need any of that for a long time."
(I probably really don't need anything like that till I have my own at home preschool, and that's not going to be for a couple more eons.)
Anywho, I'm going to be twenty-three. Which is old. So. Old! :)
Last week was Valentine's Day too. My poor husband has to get me stuff for Valentine's and then exactly a week later he has to do stuff for my birthday. Poor dude.
I love him a lot and I get way too spoiled by him!
I was telling Jeff the story of the boy making me the rain stick and I was telling him that I never want our children to feel the way that boy did in that moment. I want to let our kids know that they are loved SO much every day. I want them to know that I love them enough that I will spend seven pointless minutes to find them a little piece of candy. I want my kids to know that I will stop everything else that's happening to spend a minute with them. And just them.
It might seem like I'm being a little dramatic about this situation........but I think it's important to protect childhood and foster proper child development.
You'd think I was a child development major or something, huh?
Ha.
I love kids!
I'm sure I'll love the new ones I'm going to meet at my internship tomorrow too.
Onto my new adventure!
Saturday, February 2, 2013
Saturday Night = Facebook Stalking and Homework
Conversation I just had with my husband:
Jeff *looking at the computer screen*: "Who is that?"
Me *on facebook*: "Oh....well, it's my old boyfriend's best friend's sister."
Jeff: "Your what???"
Me: "My old boyfriend's best friend's sister."
Jeff: "How did you get there?? That must mean you were looking at your old boyfriend!!"
Me: "Well, originally....yes. Then I found another person I used to know....then another person from there....and I just keep going..."
Jeff: "k, but wait, you were Facebook stalking your old boyfriend.....I don't Facebook stalk MY ex-girlfriend!"
Me: "No, YOU don't. But I do!"
Facebook stalking.
I don't keep up on people from my old life ("old life"....???) very much, but when I do look them up it's kind of funny to see what is happening in their lives. Most of my ex-boyfriends are married now. One of them has a baby! Half of them I'm actually friends with on Facebook though so it's not too creepy that I know these things, right? Riiiiiiiiiiiiight.
I generally don't live in the past. Actually, I next to never think about the past. I'm very much a future kind of girl. I'm always thinking about things a year in advance. It's kind of a problem. But ya know, whatever, I can't change my brain. At least not very easily.
Anyways, onto other more important, logical things!
Student teaching has been going great! It's definitely changing everything I've ever thought about teaching. Having worked with kids for five years I THOUGHT I knew a lot about teaching. I was very wrong! Student teaching is the refiner's fire, I've decided. I love working with the supervising teacher I was assigned to. She teaches me new things everyday! I love the way she teaches.
Well, I need to get off of Facebook and do some homework.
Saturday night.........doing homework. My life is so exciting!
Jeff was gone all day studying and taking two tests. (which he totally aced, nbd) Have I ever mentioned how great he is? Oh yeah................like every time I post, huh?
Well, he really is.
We always have people telling us that we are crazy that we work and go to school (especially Jeff for working full-time). He's awesome though and gets A's and B's all the while. I'm very grateful for him.
I guess I will leave you with a cute quote I found about children. Kids are the best! I love this apostle too.... :)
"We must be so careful in speaking to a child. What we say or don't say, how we say it and when is so very, very important in shaping a child's view of himself or herself. But it is even more important in shaping that child's faith in us and their faith in God."
- Jeffrey R. Holland
Jeff *looking at the computer screen*: "Who is that?"
Me *on facebook*: "Oh....well, it's my old boyfriend's best friend's sister."
Jeff: "Your what???"
Me: "My old boyfriend's best friend's sister."
Jeff: "How did you get there?? That must mean you were looking at your old boyfriend!!"
Me: "Well, originally....yes. Then I found another person I used to know....then another person from there....and I just keep going..."
Jeff: "k, but wait, you were Facebook stalking your old boyfriend.....I don't Facebook stalk MY ex-girlfriend!"
Me: "No, YOU don't. But I do!"
Facebook stalking.
I don't keep up on people from my old life ("old life"....???) very much, but when I do look them up it's kind of funny to see what is happening in their lives. Most of my ex-boyfriends are married now. One of them has a baby! Half of them I'm actually friends with on Facebook though so it's not too creepy that I know these things, right? Riiiiiiiiiiiiight.
I generally don't live in the past. Actually, I next to never think about the past. I'm very much a future kind of girl. I'm always thinking about things a year in advance. It's kind of a problem. But ya know, whatever, I can't change my brain. At least not very easily.
Anyways, onto other more important, logical things!
Student teaching has been going great! It's definitely changing everything I've ever thought about teaching. Having worked with kids for five years I THOUGHT I knew a lot about teaching. I was very wrong! Student teaching is the refiner's fire, I've decided. I love working with the supervising teacher I was assigned to. She teaches me new things everyday! I love the way she teaches.
Well, I need to get off of Facebook and do some homework.
Saturday night.........doing homework. My life is so exciting!
Jeff was gone all day studying and taking two tests. (which he totally aced, nbd) Have I ever mentioned how great he is? Oh yeah................like every time I post, huh?
Well, he really is.
We always have people telling us that we are crazy that we work and go to school (especially Jeff for working full-time). He's awesome though and gets A's and B's all the while. I'm very grateful for him.
I guess I will leave you with a cute quote I found about children. Kids are the best! I love this apostle too.... :)
"We must be so careful in speaking to a child. What we say or don't say, how we say it and when is so very, very important in shaping a child's view of himself or herself. But it is even more important in shaping that child's faith in us and their faith in God."
- Jeffrey R. Holland
Monday, January 21, 2013
Theory Brought to Life
I'm trying to get a bunch of things done for my student teaching today since we have the day off and in the process I found this awesome quote! I love finding quotes that summarize parts of why I want to be a teacher. This quote says directly what I want for my students and explains what I feel like my role as a teacher is. (and I just love Gardner's theories too)
"I want my children to understand the world, but not just because the world is fascinating and the human mind is curious. I want them to understand it so that they will be positioned to make it a better place. Knowledge is not the same as morality, but we need to understand if we are to avoid past mistakes and move in productive directions. An important part of that understanding is knowing who we are and what we can do... Ultimately, we must synthesize our understandings for ourselves. The performance of understanding that try matters are the ones we carry out as human beings in an imperfect world which we can affect for good or for ill." -Howard Gardner
(this may or may not be the shortest blog post I've ever done, but I just needed to get this on here so I'd have it for future reference :) )
"I want my children to understand the world, but not just because the world is fascinating and the human mind is curious. I want them to understand it so that they will be positioned to make it a better place. Knowledge is not the same as morality, but we need to understand if we are to avoid past mistakes and move in productive directions. An important part of that understanding is knowing who we are and what we can do... Ultimately, we must synthesize our understandings for ourselves. The performance of understanding that try matters are the ones we carry out as human beings in an imperfect world which we can affect for good or for ill." -Howard Gardner
(this may or may not be the shortest blog post I've ever done, but I just needed to get this on here so I'd have it for future reference :) )
Friday, January 11, 2013
Snow snow snooooow!
It's a snow day! The only other snow day I remember in my history as a Utahan is once when I was in 1st or 2nd grade it snowed a lot and we got to stay home from school.
Ogden and Davis County got hit pretty hard with lots of snow yesterday and in the night. I was so stressed out this morning too, because I didn't know if I still needed to go to my student teaching or not. I guess I'm just paranoid. I got a voicemail and two emails saying the ENTIRE campus was closed...........but I still thought that I maybe needed to go.
I have issues. With logic. And. Stuff.
Whatever.
It's been great though being home today. Once I finally figured out that logically I didn't need to go this morning the first thought that came to my mind was......."yay, I can finally do the dishes!!"
Getting used to this new semester has left me zero time to clean. Getting the dishes done was probably the best part of my day. Theeeeeeeeeeeeen....the worst part of my day happened. After I was done with the dishes I magically clogged the garbage disposal. It probably wasn't magic, but it seemed that way to me.
I tried unclogging the disposal with a plunger and finally I gave up. I then texted Jeff and told him what had happened and this is the text I received back: "Don't do anything til I get home."
Ha ha ha ha! I love it. So now my house kind of smells funky, but I've been instructed to wait (when I already tried fixing it....and failed.......make it fine with me!)
Anyways, I got the apartment all shiny and clean (other than the kitchen sink) so I thought I would hurry and blog before I have to brave the storm to get to work.
This week has been so much fun! I started my student teaching on Monday. The kids didn't come till Tuesday though. They are all so cute! I love being around children that age because everything is about discovery.
I know I blog about this..........a lot, but it hit me again this week......it's so crazy to me how much socio-economic status factors into life. There is such a drastic difference between the children at my student teaching and the kids at my work. Big difference. And it's all because of their social class/status/way of life their parents have chosen.
There are a couple of kids in my student teaching class that give the teachers a run for their money sometimes (SOMETIMES), but overall they are all really sweet children. And besides that, it's developmentally appropriate to test emotions at that age anyways. That's just what kids who are three to five do. They are egocentric and don't really get a lot of the whole regulating emotions thing.
It kind of made me laugh though because there is one child in my student teaching class who is a little different and my head teacher said to me the other day: "he has some real issues". I laughed at that because the way he acts is totally how many of my kids at work act. Hyper, crazy, needs constant watching, tests limits......you name it, they do it.
We got a new co-worker about a week ago. I don't think he's ever worked with kids before and it's kind of funny to watch him. He always seems overwhelmed by what the children are doing, because like I said, many of them are crazy!
The kids we work with come from rough situations. I can't tell you how many times we've had kids tell us: "no, my parents really can't pay right now! They are broke. They don't have any money to fix our car." Or any other myriad of excuses. It's forty dollars a month for their child to come to the program. For 2 1/2 hours a day (4 1/2 on Fridays) that's less than 50 cents an hour.
It just breaks my heart how families get into such bad situations like that. I guess it all comes down to agency though. Lots of people are born into poverty.......but a lot of people choose it for themselves because they don't want to work hard for a better life.
Many of the parents of our children do work very hard though. That's what makes it even sadder.
It makes me grateful to have the gospel. Having the gospel in my life has taught me to be a hardworker. I know that sounds kind of odd, but it's true! Knowing what God wants for my life has helped me see that family is essential to His plan. Since I know that, I've always learned that having a healthy family is important. In order to have a healthy family I need to have a healthy relationship with my husband. In order for that to happen we need to love each other. And because we love each other we want to work hard and provide a healthy future for our children. And because of that we are going to college to provide for them.
I'm very fortunate that I've been able to go to school and that I'm graduating soon. In the education building there are tons or women (I dare say the majority of them) that are mothers going to school. I look up to them a lot because I would never be able to do that. I'm so grateful I'll be graduated by the time I have my first baby.
I've also been very fortunate that I've worked so many jobs involving children. It makes me happy because I feel like I really know that it's something I love to do. I'm glad that I can feel the satisfaction I feel when I work with kids and teach them.
I'm excited for this semester because I'll get to grow in new ways as a teacher. I'm looking forward to graduating, but I think the journey till then is going to be awesome. :)
Ogden and Davis County got hit pretty hard with lots of snow yesterday and in the night. I was so stressed out this morning too, because I didn't know if I still needed to go to my student teaching or not. I guess I'm just paranoid. I got a voicemail and two emails saying the ENTIRE campus was closed...........but I still thought that I maybe needed to go.
I have issues. With logic. And. Stuff.
Whatever.
It's been great though being home today. Once I finally figured out that logically I didn't need to go this morning the first thought that came to my mind was......."yay, I can finally do the dishes!!"
Getting used to this new semester has left me zero time to clean. Getting the dishes done was probably the best part of my day. Theeeeeeeeeeeeen....the worst part of my day happened. After I was done with the dishes I magically clogged the garbage disposal. It probably wasn't magic, but it seemed that way to me.
I tried unclogging the disposal with a plunger and finally I gave up. I then texted Jeff and told him what had happened and this is the text I received back: "Don't do anything til I get home."
Ha ha ha ha! I love it. So now my house kind of smells funky, but I've been instructed to wait (when I already tried fixing it....and failed.......make it fine with me!)
Anyways, I got the apartment all shiny and clean (other than the kitchen sink) so I thought I would hurry and blog before I have to brave the storm to get to work.
This week has been so much fun! I started my student teaching on Monday. The kids didn't come till Tuesday though. They are all so cute! I love being around children that age because everything is about discovery.
I know I blog about this..........a lot, but it hit me again this week......it's so crazy to me how much socio-economic status factors into life. There is such a drastic difference between the children at my student teaching and the kids at my work. Big difference. And it's all because of their social class/status/way of life their parents have chosen.
There are a couple of kids in my student teaching class that give the teachers a run for their money sometimes (SOMETIMES), but overall they are all really sweet children. And besides that, it's developmentally appropriate to test emotions at that age anyways. That's just what kids who are three to five do. They are egocentric and don't really get a lot of the whole regulating emotions thing.
It kind of made me laugh though because there is one child in my student teaching class who is a little different and my head teacher said to me the other day: "he has some real issues". I laughed at that because the way he acts is totally how many of my kids at work act. Hyper, crazy, needs constant watching, tests limits......you name it, they do it.
We got a new co-worker about a week ago. I don't think he's ever worked with kids before and it's kind of funny to watch him. He always seems overwhelmed by what the children are doing, because like I said, many of them are crazy!
The kids we work with come from rough situations. I can't tell you how many times we've had kids tell us: "no, my parents really can't pay right now! They are broke. They don't have any money to fix our car." Or any other myriad of excuses. It's forty dollars a month for their child to come to the program. For 2 1/2 hours a day (4 1/2 on Fridays) that's less than 50 cents an hour.
It just breaks my heart how families get into such bad situations like that. I guess it all comes down to agency though. Lots of people are born into poverty.......but a lot of people choose it for themselves because they don't want to work hard for a better life.
Many of the parents of our children do work very hard though. That's what makes it even sadder.
It makes me grateful to have the gospel. Having the gospel in my life has taught me to be a hardworker. I know that sounds kind of odd, but it's true! Knowing what God wants for my life has helped me see that family is essential to His plan. Since I know that, I've always learned that having a healthy family is important. In order to have a healthy family I need to have a healthy relationship with my husband. In order for that to happen we need to love each other. And because we love each other we want to work hard and provide a healthy future for our children. And because of that we are going to college to provide for them.
I'm very fortunate that I've been able to go to school and that I'm graduating soon. In the education building there are tons or women (I dare say the majority of them) that are mothers going to school. I look up to them a lot because I would never be able to do that. I'm so grateful I'll be graduated by the time I have my first baby.
I've also been very fortunate that I've worked so many jobs involving children. It makes me happy because I feel like I really know that it's something I love to do. I'm glad that I can feel the satisfaction I feel when I work with kids and teach them.
I'm excited for this semester because I'll get to grow in new ways as a teacher. I'm looking forward to graduating, but I think the journey till then is going to be awesome. :)
Monday, December 31, 2012
Usually.
Usually...... I wake up in the morning like I did today having a glorious thought like... "Oh my goodness, it's the last day of the year! Next year is going to be so great! So many goals, so many dreams....so much wonderment!"
So then I gear up to make a Facebook status about it....because I'm very original.... and log on to find out that everybody else has already stolen my status.
..............which then makes me retreat to my blog where I can beeeee whoever I want to beeeee. (Sorry, Les Mis is on the brain cause everybody and their dog posted about that on Facebook too)
I can't tell you how many times I've logged on to Facebook and everybody has stolen my status. It's like I'm living in a mainstream society and thinking similar thoughts to events that everyone else is experiencing with me?? Or something. Whatever. I don't like it.
I wish my thoughts were original.
Nonetheless, I am super excited for the new year! Yay!! So many fun things are going to happen.....
I'm GRADUATING.
I'll have been married for two years!
Jeff's graduating too! Just not at the cool time (spring) like all the cool kids (me) do. I always thought it would be awful to graduate in the summer or winter. I feel like the glory of graduating is much greater in the spring. (............that's not really true, but in my head... I'm going to say it is.)
Anyways, this year has been good to us. I'm neverendingly (not a real word) grateful for the opportunity I have to go to school. Also, for a husband who works his freakin tail off for us.
I'm grateful for the place that we live. It's in such a convenient spot, in a nice neighborhood. Last night our landlord came over and gave us a late Christmas present. She is a hilarious old lady. We've only met her a couple times (other than Jeff's long conversations about life with her on the phone), but she's so nice. Along with our present she gave us a hundred dollars for finding people to live here. At first she couldn't find the envelope with the money though and it was so funny! She was freaking out, kept apologizing, and just made Jeff and I laugh pretty hard. I love old ladies.
She reminded me a lot of my grandma in that moment. My grandma was always worried when little things like that would go wrong. I love my grandma. I missed her a lot this holiday season.
I've had the past couple weeks off from work (one of the perks of working at a school), which means I've had lots of time to do..........really nothing...........but I've found some useful things that needed to be done. I spent a whole day deep cleaning our apartment and I was seriously amazed at how much junk we had. I ended up taking two big garbage bags of clothes, a TV, and two bags of random items we didn't need anymore to the DI. It felt really good to get it out of our apartment, but it felt even better giving it away for free.
When I dropped it all off at the DI I had this huge surge of gratitude towards the Church and everything that they do humanitarian wise. Granted, people that go to the DI have to buy the stuff they get, but I know that some of the stuff I gave has the possibility of going somewhere around the world where the people will get it for free. And even if nothing I gave ends up that way, it still made me grateful for how much service the Church does give to people around the world. I love the Church.
Well, on to the new year, I guess. We had a great Christmas full of getting way too spoiled from all three sets of our parents. They all gave us perfect, thoughtful things. I'm so grateful to have parents who love me and want to make me happy even now that I live away from them and don't see them as much as I want to or should.
On the positive side, I am going to see Breaking Dawn right now with my mom and sister! Ha ha. Don't judge me. I'm just curious to see how it is. I kind of hated part 1 so I don't have very high expectations for this one.
Well, I better go get ready. School starts next Monday! Yay! And AHH! I'm so excited, but so nervous. Bah. ....... :)
So then I gear up to make a Facebook status about it....because I'm very original.... and log on to find out that everybody else has already stolen my status.
..............which then makes me retreat to my blog where I can beeeee whoever I want to beeeee. (Sorry, Les Mis is on the brain cause everybody and their dog posted about that on Facebook too)
I can't tell you how many times I've logged on to Facebook and everybody has stolen my status. It's like I'm living in a mainstream society and thinking similar thoughts to events that everyone else is experiencing with me?? Or something. Whatever. I don't like it.
I wish my thoughts were original.
Nonetheless, I am super excited for the new year! Yay!! So many fun things are going to happen.....
I'm GRADUATING.
I'll have been married for two years!
Jeff's graduating too! Just not at the cool time (spring) like all the cool kids (me) do. I always thought it would be awful to graduate in the summer or winter. I feel like the glory of graduating is much greater in the spring. (............that's not really true, but in my head... I'm going to say it is.)
Anyways, this year has been good to us. I'm neverendingly (not a real word) grateful for the opportunity I have to go to school. Also, for a husband who works his freakin tail off for us.
I'm grateful for the place that we live. It's in such a convenient spot, in a nice neighborhood. Last night our landlord came over and gave us a late Christmas present. She is a hilarious old lady. We've only met her a couple times (other than Jeff's long conversations about life with her on the phone), but she's so nice. Along with our present she gave us a hundred dollars for finding people to live here. At first she couldn't find the envelope with the money though and it was so funny! She was freaking out, kept apologizing, and just made Jeff and I laugh pretty hard. I love old ladies.
She reminded me a lot of my grandma in that moment. My grandma was always worried when little things like that would go wrong. I love my grandma. I missed her a lot this holiday season.
I've had the past couple weeks off from work (one of the perks of working at a school), which means I've had lots of time to do..........really nothing...........but I've found some useful things that needed to be done. I spent a whole day deep cleaning our apartment and I was seriously amazed at how much junk we had. I ended up taking two big garbage bags of clothes, a TV, and two bags of random items we didn't need anymore to the DI. It felt really good to get it out of our apartment, but it felt even better giving it away for free.
When I dropped it all off at the DI I had this huge surge of gratitude towards the Church and everything that they do humanitarian wise. Granted, people that go to the DI have to buy the stuff they get, but I know that some of the stuff I gave has the possibility of going somewhere around the world where the people will get it for free. And even if nothing I gave ends up that way, it still made me grateful for how much service the Church does give to people around the world. I love the Church.
Well, on to the new year, I guess. We had a great Christmas full of getting way too spoiled from all three sets of our parents. They all gave us perfect, thoughtful things. I'm so grateful to have parents who love me and want to make me happy even now that I live away from them and don't see them as much as I want to or should.
On the positive side, I am going to see Breaking Dawn right now with my mom and sister! Ha ha. Don't judge me. I'm just curious to see how it is. I kind of hated part 1 so I don't have very high expectations for this one.
Well, I better go get ready. School starts next Monday! Yay! And AHH! I'm so excited, but so nervous. Bah. ....... :)
Tuesday, December 18, 2012
Title of a Post. :)
I've been stalking the board where my grades get posted wishing they would all be there. I know I'm getting A's in four of my classes. The last class I MIGHT be like .2% away from an A depending on how he scores our last test. If he gives us a couple extra points for some questions like I'm hoping then I'll get an A. My first ever 4.0 in college? Kind of sad it had to be my last, huh? Ha ha. But I'll take it. If I get it, that is.
I guess I could get a 4.0 with student teaching and my internship next semester....so technically this isn't my first/last.
Nonetheless...........
I only have to go to my job 36 more times before I'm done. Do you know how happy that makes me???? So. Happy. :)
I love my job for the children. I love children! They are ridiculously cute and funny. But one of my coworkers makes my life harder than I wish it to be and that's....not cute or funny. Two of my coworkers had their last day on Friday so now it's just me, the only other good one, aaaaaaaaaaaaaand the not so good one. It's going to be interesting.
But only 36 more times, right?? That seems like a lot right now.
I've been wanting to post/blog about all of the drama that's been going on on Facebook lately, but I haven't really known how to say it. I haven't really known how to properly articulate my feelings.
Oh well....let the lack of articulation begin!
There is so much negativity in the world. I feel like most people thrive on it. I know I do at times, and probably more often than I should. People love to feel strong emotions and anger is probably the strongest emotion a person can feel. People also love to feel vindicated. In some small instances it is valid to feel so. In other circumstances though it was never their position to step in and be a part of it at all and thus that feeling of vindication was never theirs to feel.
Strong emotions.
I feel like people thrive on it because it makes them feel important. It all comes back down to Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs. People want to feel loved, appreciated, accepted, and like they belong. Sometimes this leads people to saying really ridiculous things on social media that makes me view them in the opposite light.
I'm not really talking about any one dramatic thing that's been happening on Facebook lately. I'm talking about ALL of them. From the shooting in Newtown Conneticut to the "wear pants to church" dealio to all of the constant political fights, and even down to the littlest things of who's going to get the coolest thing for Christmas/spend their break the best.
And I'm really not talking about any one friend of mine on Facebook either.
When I first joined Facebook it was a fun way to look at people's lives and see what was happening with them. Slowly it's evolved into a competition of who can look the coolest, who can present themself to be the most important or knowledgable or up-to-date. Who can argue their way to the top. Who can seem the most sympathetic.
For all I know people have viewed my page and have thought the same thoughts about me that I'm trying to look like I'm on top. In a lot of ways I feel like I can tell the difference between people who are posting for the same reasons I do and those who don't. I hope I'm not viewed as pompous in any way.
But I regress...
I've still been posting things, but I haven't posted anything about the dramatic issues that have been talked about. And most of those issues I'm not even going to touch with a ten foot pole.
On Friday when the shooting happened, Jeff was home for lunch. He was looking at the laptop and said, "Oh my gosh, come here." He showed me the news report and I started to cry. It really hit home, I guess. I just thought about all of the students I've had over the past five years and what I would do if that happened to me.
All of the teachers who saved those children are heroes. Although I haven't been a "real" teacher yet I still have felt love for my students that is hard to explain. There are some children who are complete terrors and make your life miserable everyday, but if it came down to preserving their life you would do it.
For me this tragedy isn't focused on any political issues of what could have been or what should have happened differently....it's about the bravery and love of those educators. That's why I love education. It opens you up to a world of discovery and service to little people who need it so bad. Teachers should be recognized for their everyday bravery in taking on the challenges of their students.
Those teachers and students who were taken in the shooting should always be remembered. One of the little girls who was shot was the daughter/granddaughter of my grandparents best friends. I know that their family has the Gospel and I'm grateful for that. It makes me sad to think that more than a dozen of the parents of the young children who died don't have the knowledge of the plan of salvation. Even though that's true, I know that the people who perished in this tragedy are safe with our Heavenly Father.
Anyways, I figured I would post my feelings on my blog because Facebook has been pretty disheartening to me lately. I'm not trying to prove myself more sympathetic or on top. This is just how I feel.
I really need to get off of here and go Christmas shopping. I have severely procrastinated.......ha ha.
C'mon Tuesday, be good to me!
I guess I could get a 4.0 with student teaching and my internship next semester....so technically this isn't my first/last.
Nonetheless...........
I only have to go to my job 36 more times before I'm done. Do you know how happy that makes me???? So. Happy. :)
I love my job for the children. I love children! They are ridiculously cute and funny. But one of my coworkers makes my life harder than I wish it to be and that's....not cute or funny. Two of my coworkers had their last day on Friday so now it's just me, the only other good one, aaaaaaaaaaaaaand the not so good one. It's going to be interesting.
But only 36 more times, right?? That seems like a lot right now.
I've been wanting to post/blog about all of the drama that's been going on on Facebook lately, but I haven't really known how to say it. I haven't really known how to properly articulate my feelings.
Oh well....let the lack of articulation begin!
There is so much negativity in the world. I feel like most people thrive on it. I know I do at times, and probably more often than I should. People love to feel strong emotions and anger is probably the strongest emotion a person can feel. People also love to feel vindicated. In some small instances it is valid to feel so. In other circumstances though it was never their position to step in and be a part of it at all and thus that feeling of vindication was never theirs to feel.
Strong emotions.
I feel like people thrive on it because it makes them feel important. It all comes back down to Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs. People want to feel loved, appreciated, accepted, and like they belong. Sometimes this leads people to saying really ridiculous things on social media that makes me view them in the opposite light.
I'm not really talking about any one dramatic thing that's been happening on Facebook lately. I'm talking about ALL of them. From the shooting in Newtown Conneticut to the "wear pants to church" dealio to all of the constant political fights, and even down to the littlest things of who's going to get the coolest thing for Christmas/spend their break the best.
And I'm really not talking about any one friend of mine on Facebook either.
When I first joined Facebook it was a fun way to look at people's lives and see what was happening with them. Slowly it's evolved into a competition of who can look the coolest, who can present themself to be the most important or knowledgable or up-to-date. Who can argue their way to the top. Who can seem the most sympathetic.
For all I know people have viewed my page and have thought the same thoughts about me that I'm trying to look like I'm on top. In a lot of ways I feel like I can tell the difference between people who are posting for the same reasons I do and those who don't. I hope I'm not viewed as pompous in any way.
But I regress...
I've still been posting things, but I haven't posted anything about the dramatic issues that have been talked about. And most of those issues I'm not even going to touch with a ten foot pole.
On Friday when the shooting happened, Jeff was home for lunch. He was looking at the laptop and said, "Oh my gosh, come here." He showed me the news report and I started to cry. It really hit home, I guess. I just thought about all of the students I've had over the past five years and what I would do if that happened to me.
All of the teachers who saved those children are heroes. Although I haven't been a "real" teacher yet I still have felt love for my students that is hard to explain. There are some children who are complete terrors and make your life miserable everyday, but if it came down to preserving their life you would do it.
For me this tragedy isn't focused on any political issues of what could have been or what should have happened differently....it's about the bravery and love of those educators. That's why I love education. It opens you up to a world of discovery and service to little people who need it so bad. Teachers should be recognized for their everyday bravery in taking on the challenges of their students.
Those teachers and students who were taken in the shooting should always be remembered. One of the little girls who was shot was the daughter/granddaughter of my grandparents best friends. I know that their family has the Gospel and I'm grateful for that. It makes me sad to think that more than a dozen of the parents of the young children who died don't have the knowledge of the plan of salvation. Even though that's true, I know that the people who perished in this tragedy are safe with our Heavenly Father.
Anyways, I figured I would post my feelings on my blog because Facebook has been pretty disheartening to me lately. I'm not trying to prove myself more sympathetic or on top. This is just how I feel.
I really need to get off of here and go Christmas shopping. I have severely procrastinated.......ha ha.
C'mon Tuesday, be good to me!
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